I want a new drug..
*cheesey 80's Hewey Lewis soundtrack plays in background..
When my allergies kick in do I take Alavert? Benadryl? Sudafed? Claritin? Allegra?
NO!
Hey Pfizer, Schering-Plough, Aventis, and Warener-Lambert, listen up:
I eat HOT WINGS!
I took alavert this morning, which always works for me at some level but not today. We haven't had rain in weeks, but last night we got blasted, so I suspect that every pollen bearing plant in Northern Virginia spewed its toxic load first thing this morning, crippling my sinuses. Alavert is 24-hour medicine so I did not want to take anything else, I was just going to have to suffer through it, NOT SO! Hot Wings from the Buffalo Wing Factory to the rescue!
While my cholesterol level went up 15 points over lunch, 30 wings later and I am breathing again! They could call the habanero-sauce-burnt-lips, clogged arteries, and angioplasty "side effects" and market the wings as a decongestant. My cut is 30%.
When my allergies kick in do I take Alavert? Benadryl? Sudafed? Claritin? Allegra?
NO!
Hey Pfizer, Schering-Plough, Aventis, and Warener-Lambert, listen up:
I eat HOT WINGS!I took alavert this morning, which always works for me at some level but not today. We haven't had rain in weeks, but last night we got blasted, so I suspect that every pollen bearing plant in Northern Virginia spewed its toxic load first thing this morning, crippling my sinuses. Alavert is 24-hour medicine so I did not want to take anything else, I was just going to have to suffer through it, NOT SO! Hot Wings from the Buffalo Wing Factory to the rescue!
While my cholesterol level went up 15 points over lunch, 30 wings later and I am breathing again! They could call the habanero-sauce-burnt-lips, clogged arteries, and angioplasty "side effects" and market the wings as a decongestant. My cut is 30%.
posted by Sponge at 2:13 PM
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